Notes on Refuge


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Survive eleven months (April 18, 2019; March 18, 2020)

When I try to tell you what happened, my ability to verbalize drops away. When I try to tell you what happened, I even forget completely what I was going to say.
  This is a way the body protects itself when it has been traumatized. But this body is healing, and it has been practicing…”

Survive eleven months (April 18, 2019; March 18, 2020)  read more…

Contributor invitation: Restoring resilience in communities experiencing trauma

Are you a trauma survivor who seems to suddenly or repeatedly become a scapegoat to others when your pain threshold is crossed?

If you have had this experience, please accept my invitation to be part of our public radio conversation in order to create solidarity, understanding, and greater community safety for trauma survivors who cannot talk about it on the radio or participate openly.

*Short discussions using phone calls or Zoom video calls. (More options listed below.)
*Recordings will be made using speakerphone on phone calls, unless we have the option of making a clearer recording (with Zoom).
*Stabilizing conversations addressing challenging topics, showing up with our best support, kindness, and patience for one another.

*In what ways is the “novel coronavirus” situation creating more resources for trauma survivors than we had before?
*In what ways is the “novel coronavirus” situation creating more obstacles for trauma survivors than we had before?
*Where do we need increased awareness of the effects of trauma in our daily lives, right now?

If you can join me on a phone call or on a Zoom call to record in real time, please send me a note with your phone number to or message privately via I can also receive private Telegram messages at

To share your thoughts in public broadcast, send a text response by email to: You can also send a text response at this page: Send in an audio clip by recording here:

Content will be published to Intuitive Public Radio and shared within some hours or days after our conversation. (Due to current adversity, time frames are not exact. Let’s stay in touch so that I can let you know when your segments go up.)

You can send me a private message or ask me questions by emailing or messaging via You can find out more about me on this page: Please send me additional or repeat messages if you need to in order to get my attention, and my apologies for anything I may miss. I am striving through physical difficulties to create safety and public community resources that can help myself and others.

My previous post with additional context can be found here:

This can get better for me and for all of us. Caring participants are greatly appreciated. You have my permission to copy and paste this message to share with others — with my gratitude.

Across the Intuitive community network

Soon from the queue…
Links & excerpts from Notes on Refuge, IPR Pittsburgh, and across the Intuitive community network

Just published…
Resolution in Conversation & Power as a GiftIntuitive Public Radio

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…to browse our updated Telegram channel directory, which is now a lot more like browsing a website than it ever has been before.

This contains huge archives of survivor-led initiatives and knowledgebase content our members have compiled with their lives on the line. We are building a good community library for you. Please visit us and make gentle friends with those you meet along the way.

PS. Wondrous appreciation for everyone in Telegram messenger development. Thank you for creating something so beautifully usable for us and ours. We couldn’t find anything else that worked, then this. You are superheroes.

Air #NotesOnRefuge • IPR •••

Who picked the very most challenging problem she could get her paws on? THIS gal.

A few weeks back on we discussed collaborative infrastructure for survivors of severe environmental conditions — illnesses, traumas, & extreme adversity. From that episode:

We are continuing that conversation this morning — with audio recorded since then. If you’d like to contribute, we’ll be adding audio all day. You can leave us messages via Telegram in or from the Anchor FM app on your smartphone at in order to participate “live on the air.”

We are alive, and we are intent on the subject of AIR.

Here is the beginning of our episode, which we will be updating all day.

Follow this podcast at from your desktop or mobile device.

We’ll see u there. <3

. . .

. . .

If you don’t know where else to turn, well, we didn’t either. So we made some spacetime.

Please make some space — and time — to nourish yourself and connect with us on Telegram.

We are raising up the very conversations we all most need
in the terrible violence, chaos, meaning,
& possibility of our present age.

thanks for doing this work with us.

. . .

#NotesOnRefuge • IPR •••

Mago commented on this video and until I saw her comment I did not remember recording it. I just watched it. I was able to watch it again and I don’t remember any of it.

But I think I made a few clear points.

I think I should do more of something with this, and need to figure out what that is.

Grateful for inputs.

#CompassionCommunity • IPR •••

Glad for a few moments of flow where I can say something I have wanted to say. Thank you to Jena for her post.

Here are the thoughts that are on my mind.

People who use bullying tactics to stop people talking about vaccine injuries are people who are too afraid to peaceably examine the facts in front of us, together, so that we can collaborate towards compassionate solutions.

People who use bullying tactics to stop conversations being initiated by people who have been hurt are people who are unable to practice compassion towards a person in front of them who is hurting.

These are not character insults. The world we live in is extremely stressful. Our widespread trauma is not only invisible, it is very physical.

Lots of people are experiencing legitimate torture, dying of terrible and severe conditions, amidst intense general insistence that none of us seriously use the words that are most accurate to describe these experiences.

Certain over-the-counter pharmaceutical drugs are shown to reduce empathy, perhaps physiologically limiting your access to perceiving and offering compassionate energy.

Some of the people perpetuating vaccine-related bullying tactics stand to make money from their efforts; some of them would receive terrible abuse from others around them if they were found supporting any kind of vaccine conversation.

Both are at a crux of invisible fear and pain that can only be eased with solutions in community.

Safe communication spaces must support both of these kinds of people, too.

Right now, most people do not have easily accessible patterns that tell them how to be compassionate towards others without being harmed themselves, and they are unable to communicate about it in any way that feels safe for them.

All of this will be easier when we have better ways of practicing compassionate interactions.

In the meantime, please try not to bowl over people who are trying to talk about vaccines (or any other topic they maintain is crucial to their health and survival).

Help those who are trying to communicate by listening closely and standing up for their safety in expressing themselves, especially if they are vulnerable and multiply-marginalized.

If you aren’t sure how to do that, I’m very interested in collaborative dialogues where we put together simple templates we can each follow for exactly what we need…

…so that we will no longer be arguing and fighting and exchanging threat responses endlessly.

Then we can get to the part about healing.

Thanks for reading.



Helpful footnote:

If a person seems unable to communicate politely, they may be too traumatized to communicate politely and should be supported where they’re at by a person who can safely offer that support.

Many times polite communication is not possible because a person is being forced to communicate in the worst possible way.

A person in extremity is searching every moment for the way that will work, the way that will reduce pain and difficulty, and the way that they will be safe in community.

Survivors in extreme trauma will calm down and communicate in a more organized way immediately once they get their real needs met and are out of extreme pain.

It is fruitless to blame them for the known symptoms of physiological trauma, or put off repairing communications because you think you already know (often erroneously) what is needed.

We get significantly better results by offering survivors support that eases their suffering and allows them to communicate more effectively — first.

This is the best way to reinstate a calm, kind, productive conversation.


Saved here for #IntuitivePublicRadio.